Park'd - at Saratoga Springs

Dozens of individual entrepreneurs with homes near the racetrack convert these sites into money-making propositions using readily-available materials, and you can too!

MATERIALS NEEDED

1 stick
1 sq. ft., orange cloth
1 small roll, duct tape
1 pc. oak tag, white
1 Sharpie pen, black
1 folding lawn chair

To enter this rewarding industry, tape orange cloth to stick; write the word “Parking” on the oak tag with Sharpie Pen (as well as day rate); unfold lawn chair; sit down; using dominant hand, wave orange cloth at passing drivers with sweeping motion indicating that their money is far more important than your lawn.

- Excerpt from “So You’re Thinking Of A Part-Time Career In Parking: Secrets of the Pros”

Here in Saratoga Springs, you can find out just about everything you need to know from owner-operated parking lots.

• If parking prices are increasing, you are moving towards the track.
• If the numeral “6” (as in “$6”) was created by the addition of a pen stroke to the numeral “5,” or if an “8” looks like it was, at some point in the recent past, a “7,” then you are in Saratoga on the day of a big race.
• Conversely, if the numerals have been subtly or obviously altered to create lower numbers, either a) attendance is down, or b) it is late in the afternoon.

How To Select Off-Track Parking

You want to select a parking entrepreneur who looks like he or she is truly ready and eager to park your car. The most reliable guide to selecting an owner-operator is past performance – how have they parked at this track in the past?

If you don’t have access to this information, look at the parker as he or she waves the flag. Note any signs of lameness, excessive sweating, foaming/drooling from the mouth, over-excitability, runny eyes or nose, or popping the tail up and down. Any of these is a negative sign.

What Are The Odds My Car Will Be Damaged?

Many people become confused when trying to determine the odds that their car will be scratched or dented in Off-Track Parking.

It’s important to remember that these odds are not set by the parking entrepreneur, but rather by the car owners themselves. The amount of money spent on an individual car determines the odds for damage.

Cars which take a great deal of money to purchase will have lower odds (indicating higher likelihood) than, say, a Kia or a Daewoo. Remember also that the odds change every minute – if a Mercedes CL600 and Bentley Continental GT pull in after you, your odds become higher (indicating lower likelihood).

Unpredictable Fun!

Even the most knowledgeable enthusiasts “make their selection” and “put their money down” without knowing how a particular parker will perform on a particular day. Even first-timers can “get lucky” picking a parking spot based on something as frivolous as the color of the parker’s shirt… or because “they have a feeling” based on the way a parker swings the flag.

At the end of a day of racing, when you return to your car, you may be a “winner;” you may be a “loser,” but one thing’s for sure: you won’t know which ‘till you check out your car.